Tres

De bar em bar seguíamos naquela noite clandestina, que se repetia vivendo na vontade de mais uma vez acontecer. Éramos um e ao mesmo tempo três partes distintas. Queríamos estar unidos unificados, liberdade.
Sensibilidade dedicação e vontade de sempre estar bem era o lema de ate então uma amizade que florescia e onde os frutos digeridos pelo devaneio dos momentos constantes presentes, nos alimentavam .
A resposta e que não queriamos, não procurávamos só estávamos lá, para juntos sermos um perfeito todo.
Seguíamos sem destino nem rumo. Nossa meta era somente estar ali juntos e felizes. A magia daqueles momentos se repetia cada vez que aquele teorema era mais uma vez desenhado, promessas de mais uma vez estar naquele momento eram feitas noite a dentro.

Mundo deficiente

O mundo com todo desenvolvimento, nos torna deficientes. Vivemos em uma comunidade onde o rótulo da ¨perfeiçao¨ é constantemente modificado e então nos mostrado para uma adaptaçao quase que obrigatória. Se não adaptarmos ao meio, sofremos preconceito e não somos mais parte daquele todo perfeito, deficientes.
Deficientes somos todos que não entendemos que somos iguais, não existem diferenças ou diferentes, existem pessoas únicas, na maneira de pensar, agir, viver e serem felizes.
O rótulo que vivemos nos induz a pensar e agir de maneira paradoxa muitas vezes. Lembremos todos que somos, e estamos e às vezes o diferente é pra nos lembrar que somos perfeitos em sermos quem somos, únicos. Pois fazemos parte do mundo e mais importante estamos vivos e vivemos.

Lust

Like a child he washed my body with his eyes, he wanted to porsue what was already
his, no need to ask, no need to need. I was his and no longer belonged in me...
the wanting grow stronger and burst into flames at the upmost of our pation.
The flames burned our souls and casted my future, of 'amargura' drama, and sin.
I had let myself be enlaced by all his magic. The space of a moment was enough
for the extase of our most obcene encounters. Desire, lust and love was lived and experienced
in those steamy nights of that exotic enviroment.
My barries were crashed and innocence ausent in my then life, my mind wanted otherwise
Water splashing and murmur of desire was the background music for the most obsece encounters.
libido was my jail.

Let it

It scared me deeply. I was disrupted and somehow invaded.
I wanted to be let be, the rest of me, the used part of that defenceless being.
Just drag me, pull me and resize me, shape me into something new and indestructible.
I was just a fantasy in the middle of it al.
No reaction was sensed from me.
Just willingness to participate.
Just give me, bless me with it all, and let me taste it, you.
Slowly all the corruption took part of me and I was no longer me.
There was hollowness and a slice of hope in place of the then me.
Was I ready to restart.
Should I just keep still? Questioning something foreign and yet so well known.
Confusion took place and the darkness that blinded me was replaced by all that light that was just as blinding.
“Let me escape!” my inner would shout.
“Let me forget!”
My conscious pleads for it, but it remained there.
And still is.

indecition

From across the room i felt the steamy scence of
desire crossing the barries of that forbiden love. I wanted but the issues that
held me were stronger then my weak being. From time to time i gave it in to the pleasure of the flesh,
while i pretended with the inocence of a child, that what was then being practise, was just an action
of the most pleasurable insanity.I fought with my inermost being not knowing what scared me so much.
Inconstantly i tryed to overcome what held me back from the one difficult step that prevented me from the path
of rightness. The mark of unconsivable rules were present in those years of secluded love and desire.
That was the price i payed for not allowing two bodies abuse of such harmless actions.
The end came but it did not finish, new doors were open to a whole new start, where barries were overcomed and
new decitions made.

walk

Its in fact a cicle that is never still. By gazing at the outside window which
opened to that world, it shows exactly what is everywhere. People meandring, going from points to points.
Making conections and designing paths.
A life that sometimes does not take nor even reveals itself.
Different speed and gos, the commun thing then is to carry on,
it may look as though they are walking forward but no,
most of the time the ilusion of the repetition is just an utopic reality.

tati

She waved her hand good bye, Serene and complex she stood there gazing to
the blank of yet an unfulfilled future. What drove her forward was also what
held her back. She lived till then with all she had, the wanting that grew in
her took her up to reach higher, further.She blessed me with her company,
she showed me that what they all say about friendship is actually true and
was then happening to me. My life was no longer my life my life was her life.
We were solidifing what was then to be the ultimate of a whole. I needed it i
needed her she gifted me with daily hope of making part of her history.....

tears

Life was disappointing then, tears rolled down inconstatly trying to wash the dryness out of my life
i didnt know where to stand then, the ideas, objectives the principles blended with the non experience of a life where
the desire to get there was not strong enough.
It all came to a still, the motionless of the moments kept me there for a long while,
i wanted to make a difference, and to be highlited but the hole i stuck myself in although not confortable hold my
decitions back. I stayed quiet for a while waiting for that little shread of hope to burst and melt it over my life, the energy needed for what was then necessary.
It was easy and almost meaningless, it felt empty and with no structure, i needed a solid spot to stand on
but my legs were weak. the food for my soul was starving my brain and leaving me aimless.
My soul was getting weak of all that journey, that for my then vision was not leading me there,
to the so desired place.
I needed to focalize and reach for the answers. i needed to enventually find myself, but i wasnt lost, i was jsut uncapable of carry on, that was when i stoped and restarted.

in pieces

With her legs open wide waiting for the world to swallow what she was offering
she gazed not understanding how she had got there. She was unsure of her state
of indecition, she gave it away for the pleasure and the pain that was alive
in her. She stood up and meandring through all that maze she came into the reality of
her being. Static she dropped to the floor like a rotten fruit, and let her body melt and mix
with all the pain around that instant.
Someone approached her, and dragged her from her deepest dream back to reality. She was in pieces
but with a slightly smile on her face, she look up and and said with eyes of hope.